Showing posts with label recovery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label recovery. Show all posts

Autobiography of a Recovering Skinhead: The Frank Meeink Story as Told to Jody M. Roy, Ph.D. Review

Autobiography of a Recovering Skinhead: The Frank Meeink Story as Told to Jody M. Roy, Ph.D.
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Autobiography of a Recovering Skinhead: The Frank Meeink Story as Told to Jody M. Roy, Ph.D. ReviewThis book changed me. I have always wondered, "How can people be so hateful?" Nobody is born a racist. Frank spells it out in absolute honesty how to build an army of haters. Page 151 reads, "I didn't need to bother recruiting racists. All I did was befriend kids who were pissed off about being picked on day in and day out. I trusted them to pay me back with loyalty. I trusted that I could turn their humiliation into hate. All I had to do was redirect their rage until it came thundering back as racism." If you get nothing else out of this book, it is the need to be compassionate. Kids aren't the only ones picked on day in and day out. I am grateful to this author for being so brutally honest about his past and present. Frank Meeinks doesn't wrap this book up with a nice bow at the end...he is still working towards making his life better...one day at a time. And I'm absolutely a better person because of his journey.Autobiography of a Recovering Skinhead: The Frank Meeink Story as Told to Jody M. Roy, Ph.D. Overview

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The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating Review

The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating
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The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating Review"...the snail had emerged from its shell into the alien territory of my room, with no clue as to where it was or how it had arrived; the lack of vegetation and the desertlike surroundings must have seemed strange. The snail and I were both living in altered landscapes not of our choosing; I figured we shared a sense of loss and displacement."Elisabeth Tova Bailey was in her mid-thirties when struck with a mysterious illness that soon led to her complete incapacitation. Without knowing the cause, much less the cure or the course that it might take, the disease was a frightening visitor. One day, a friend stops by with a rather odd gift. A snail, from out in the yard. First placed in a flower pot and eventually a terrarium, the snail becomes Bailey's constant companion. Because of her lack of mobility and energy, much of her time was spent observing the creature.
You might think this would be dull, or worse, that you'd be stuck listening to someone bleakly describing their every physical complaint. Not so. This book has very little to do with health issues and far more to do with curiosity and resilience. Bailey is not a complainer, actual details of her health are few and without self-pity. She doesn't simply give up either, she makes clear she wants to fight this unknown assailant on her life. That she does so with the help of a small snail is astounding.
The first surprise is that snails have a daily routine. They have certain times to eat and sleep and travel. They often return to the same place to sleep, and they sleep on their side. (!!!) As she watches the daily activities of the snail, she manages to study research on snails in general and in detail. Turns out snail research is pretty deep...volumes have been written on every tiny detail. As in: snails have teeth, 2200+ of them! Seriously, if they were bigger you'd think twice about stepping on one. They also have a special talent for when the going gets tough in their little world: they start a process called estivation. It's not hibernation (they do that too!) but instead it allows them to become dormant when the weather goes bad, or they lose their preferred food source, etc. Some snails have been known to estivate more than a few years. The process of sealing off their little shell is fascinating, and a study in insulation.
Then there's the romance. Researchers have studied that too, and I won't go into too much detail, but let's just say lady snails are not complaining about romance in their life! Male snails really knock themselves out on the charm aspect. So much of the research that is out there is fascinating, and Bailey sorts through it and shares the most interesting details. This isn't just a science project for her, she sees parallels in her condition as well as the snail's. Illness took her out of her social circle, and her life seemed slow and inconsequential. And snails usually are a typical example of slow and inconsequential living:
"Everything about a snail is cryptic, and it was precisely this air of mystery that first captured my interest. y own life, I realized, was becoming just as cryptic. From the severe onset of my illness and through its innumerable relapses, my place in the world has been documented more by my absence than by my presence. While close friends understood my situation, those who didn't know me well found my disappearance from work and social circles inexplicable.
...it wasn't that I had truly vanished; I was simply homebound, like a snail pulled into its shell. But being homebound in the human world is a sort of vanishing."
What makes this memoir unique, besides her indomitable spirit, is that she doesn't push any sort of religious or spiritual agenda for her positive outlook. There is no implied message, which is often a feature of such an inspiring book. Her facts are based on solid research, and she doesn't waste words; her prose is clear and precise. Additionally, and this may be trivial, but the book is exceptionally beautiful: little snail insignias, and designs, poetic quotes, and the actual fonts and design layout make it lovely.
One word of warning. Some inspirational "illness" stories often end up being the 'go to' gift choice for a sick friend. I know of one gentleman, who, when diagnosed with a serious illness, received eight copies of Tuesdays with Morrie from well-meaning friends. This is not that kind of book. It would be a far better gift for a Type-A personality that needs to slow down in their hectic life, or a book just to savor for yourself. It actually might make a great gift for a young person interested in science (the "romance" portions are tame). In any case, this book made me want to reconsider how much of my hectic life could be slowed down to enjoy the smaller but ultimately relevant details in the natural world around me.The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating Overview

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We All Fall Down: Living with Addiction Review

We All Fall Down: Living with Addiction
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We All Fall Down: Living with Addiction ReviewI read Tweak after reading Beautiful Boy, by Nic's father, twice. I am the mother of an addict. When I saw Nic had written another book, I instantly read the reviews and kindled it immediately, honestly not expecting to be as moved by it as I was by Tweak. That is not the case. Nic, thank you for writing this book, it was amazing.
It may sound odd to call a book about the tortures of someones life amazing, but, this book is. Nic lets us see every twisted, terrible downward spiral by being honest with how he feels and what he thinks, no matter how dirty it sounds. His braveness is unbelievable, letting us see the worst of him. Then, we also get a glimpse of the greatness in him and the hope that lies within. And that hope gives me hope, for him, for my son, for every addict out there.
Nic DOES NOT whine about 12 step programs nor does he bash them. He simply doesn't think they are his way. They may work for most, but perhaps not for him, or they are not the be all end all. He does participate in treatment that is not 12 step based, although he said he goes to a meeting once in a while. Since when does one thing make sense for ALL, every single person? That thinking is so off track. There is always a percentage of people that the common cure does not work for. All Nic is saying is that 12 step isn't for him, let's not crucify him for it. If he had cancer, maybe chemo would work for most, but maybe not for him, are we gonna fry him for that? I applaud how he figured out what he is comfortable with, and stayed true to himself. He doesn't say don't do treatment, he says find the treatment that feels right to you.
This book is just as good as Tweak, and I sincerely hope Nic keeps writing, because I, for one, will be buying his next one.
Be well Nic and thank you, thank you, thank you.
We All Fall Down: Living with Addiction Overview

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Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too Review

Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too
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Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too ReviewI just looked up the word "campy," and there is nothing campy about Life without Ed. As a woman recovering from an eating disorder and as a clinician treating eating disorders, I find this book to be a refreshing change from the staus quo of tortuous memoirs and over-intellectualized material that tends to occupy this market.
The recovery work described in this book is undoubtedly the real deal. Jenni Schaefer has obviously worked hard to overcome her eating disorder and she is to be congratulated for that. And while we're at it, let's congratulate her for the willingness to share her story so candidly, and for being creative enough to bring such a delightful sense of humor to this very serious subject matter. She no doubt gets some of the humor from her therapist and co-author Thom Rutledge. His writing (the best of which is Embracing Fear) always manages to bring together serious self-help and the kind of humor that offers a perspective that is in and of itself healing.
If you have even the slightest interest in understanding the inner-workings of eating disorders, buy this book. If you are a therapist or counselor who works with eating disorders, buy this book. If you love someone with an eating disorder, buy this book. And if you have an eating disorder --- definitely buy this book.
Who says medicine has to taste bad to be good? Learn, grow and enjoy Life without Ed.
Sarah Wiley, Ph.D.Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too Overview

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The Spirituality of Imperfection: Storytelling and the Search for Meaning Review

The Spirituality of Imperfection: Storytelling and the Search for Meaning
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The Spirituality of Imperfection: Storytelling and the Search for Meaning ReviewThis book is to spirituality as riding a rollercoaster is to physics. It is not a read; it is an experience. Kurtz and Ketcham have managed to tell their own story in such a way that the reader is invited to share in that experience.
Finding this spirituality of imperfection in Alcoholics Anonymous and the twelve-step program, K&K have scoured spiritual writings throughout history to find the words to describe their experience. Boldface quotes and stories color almost every page.
K&K find the essence of the spiritual in human imperfections and failure, in the inevitability of pain. Spirituality is not the evasion of consequences or errors, but rather learning how to live with them. They call trying to be perfect the most tragic human mistake. They are clear, spirituality is found in asking the right questions, not in finding the right answers.
Perhaps every reader of this book will not be able to hear it's music. Perhaps only those who have been wounded by life, need it. Perhaps only those who have drunk deeply of failure will find nourishment here. All I know is that I did, and to Kurtz and Ketcham I will always be grateful.The Spirituality of Imperfection: Storytelling and the Search for Meaning Overview

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